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Red Hair Don’t Care

A few weeks ago I colored the hair red. Well, I should say my friend colored my hair red because I asked her to change it. Mainly because I was just super excited for Katy Perry in concert so I thought why not? But I’m also in the business of rejecting societal norms these days. The shock value is just an added bonus!

BUT…the funniest part has been my ten year olds reaction to his mother’s antics. He HATES the hair and I do mean HATES it. To the tune of many lectures about my decision making. So much so that I put hair extensions in the next evening because he wanted to refuse family night out together which could have been because he has seen one too many sugar plums dancing or the red hair…I’m not really sure. But it was epic taunting material at my finger tips.

Lucky for him it was only temporary color. He does not like change. Who does right? But I suppose that is why I colored it. Life has taught me that we become better people when we don’t resist change. Because just maybe, what we think is the only way isn’t really the only way. But learning that the hard way is not failure, it is just a step. Most importantly, it’s the time to time to ask God to forgive us for the limited perspective until life taught us otherwise.

My mothers on the other hand love the hair! How about that for this beautiful hot mess of a flip flopped sandwich generation? YES!

But for real, what I do with my hair is nobody’s business but my own. Much like like blogging is for many, the freedom of self-expression. What we choose to see of it is our choice. Which is exactly what I used to teach my son. From the red hair don’t care mom squad. 🙂

Ps – We like funny videos…and peoples…I would have done purple but it is Christmas so red was in order. Plus I’ve had some good laughs tormenting my son. HA! It has now faded though which I’m sad about this week. DARN! I should have done permanent. However, there is always 2018!

Merry Christmas! Hooray it’s Christmas vacation! 🎄❤️🙏🏻

Loved By Grace,

Aimee

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Paid in Full

I read a blog entry today about a man not believing in Christ and how the individual sought to share that belief by means of instilling fear and chaos.  It sounded like the person was unhappy and wanted to make sure everyone else was too. You know what they say, misery loves company.

It’s sad really because we can all suffer from our human perspective and the thing is our thoughts will dictate our reality. Thoughts of Christ delivers peace and hope and love. But if we choose to reject it, life will deliver a perspective without His spirit.

That is to say if we look for evidence of no Christ, we will damn near find it people.

But what happens when we fix our thoughts on Jesus with enough stubborn persistence in the midst of fear and chaos? I will tell you what happens to me. I start to see evidence of Christ’s spirit at every turn.

Which leads me to something that happened yesterday. I’ve been a part of a women’s group (mothers of preschoolers) for two years. The circumstances around my joining this group at church was a rocky road, mostly because of poor decisions on my part. One that God without question reconciled almost immediately. But before that I had missed the boat. Actually I was on the boat but I stepped off of it. Then the boat pulled back to the dock at Christmas so I could get back on it. It was up to me though to take the step of faith.

Lately I’ve been feeling like I should step down from my spot on this boat. Mostly because I’m working more and my preschooler is not so much of a preschooler any longer. This spring will be my last semester anyway because moms “graduate” once the kindergartener does, meaning we are no longer eligible for MOPS. I’ve just been feeling like it might be time to give another Mom the spot since there is a waiting list to join. Our last meeting of the semester was yesterday and I was expecting to be reminded about dues for the Spring. I was prepared to step down that day. Not because the money is an issue or that I have a concern with dues because the funds support an extremely important ministry. Supporting young motherhood which is a season of life that at times takes much but gives little. Or at least it can feel that way.

But is it really giving little? Jesus reminded me this is our limited human perspective.

I was reminded of this quote of yesterday..

Then at our seats was a piece of red paper that said…Merry Christmas, you are already paid in full next semester, with Love. ❤️

Sweet Jesus! Clearly I’m not supposed to step aside just yet. He was not letting me off the boat!

So when we are feeling discouraged, having doubts, believing we are unloveable, feeling incapable or any other negative emotion, remember it is coming from our limited human perspective.

But when we fix our eyes on the real Jesus we see more clearly and our thoughts become more spirit filled. That’s not to say life is without challenges but our perspective is changed. We might miss the boat a time or two or three but Jesus can bring us back to it again even if we don’t think it’s possible. And sometimes when we are in the boat and try to step off he simply won’t let us.

A life with Jesus is a life paid in full.❤️

Loved By Grace,

Aimee

Pick Me Up Jar

This is one of my favorite of favorites of FAVS photos of all time. Now on year four of this journey is mind blowing. It is your journey sweet girl but my job is to clear away the voices of the world that diminish anything other than the truth of who you are in Christ.

You are currently sleeping soundly this morning from overload which is understandable given the week at hand. I know you want to homeschool and this might very well happen at some point in time but for now you are handling the balance of life with grace. It's good for you because it is teaching you how to be true to yourself in a world that doesn't understand belonging is not about being just like everyone else. And in turn it just might be encouraging others to do the same.

However, sometimes we fall…doesn't do any good to pretend otherwise. Not the poster child for the rise and fall message but the amazing thing is Jesus tends to recruit from the pit, not the pedestal. Which means this girl right here is pretty good at the fall, working on the rise. Which also makes me a messy grace advocate. There is a teacher however who shows us messy grace perfectly and his name is Jesus.

Jesus answered them, "Healthy people don't need a doctor, sick people do. I have come to call sinners to turn from their sins, not to spend my time with those who think they are already good enough." ~ Luke 5:31-32.

You'll be very unhappy about this photo but will forgive me a later time when you are once again needing a rest day with a cup of hot chocolate at Christmas. It will remind you of these memories and you will smile.

Because this is the stuff memories are made of right here. I asked you the other day if you think you will remember moments when you got something, you know, brought something home with you.
Or if you will remember the moments you connected with simply the memory of being part of something. You responded with the second statement.

It can be a hard lesson but so very true.

Rest and remember who you are in Christ matters exponentially more than any voices, internal or external to the contrary.

I can do all this through him who gives me strength. ~ Philippians 4:13 ❤️

The pick me up jar.

  1. Be still, my soul, the Lord is by thy side” KatherinevonShlegel
  2. Fear not, I Am With Thee, be not dismayed, for I Am Thy God. I will strengthen thee, I will help thee, I will uphold with the right
    hand of my righteousness. ~ Isaiah 41:10
  3. Wait on the Lord, be of courage and He will strengthen thy heart. ~ Psalm 27:14
  4. Keep trying, keep trusting, keep believing, keep growing. Heaven is cheering for you! Today, tomorrow and forever. ~ Elder Holland
  5. See the good in yourself! ~ Elder Holland
  6. We are infinitely more than our limitations and our afflictions. ~ Jeffery R. Holland
  7. Don't you quit. You keep walking. You keep trying. There is help and happiness ahead. ~ Jeffrey R. Holland
  8. Always believe that something wonderful is about to happen.
  9. Never give up on anyone, and that includes giving up on yourself! ~ Dieter F. Uchtdorf
  10. God didn’t design us to be sad. He created us to have joy! ~ Dieter F. Uchtdorf
  11. When life gets too hard to stand, kneel.
  12. Rejection is Gods way of saying “wrong choice dear”.
  13. Come what may and love it!
  14. Don’t let the silly little things steal your happiness.
  15. Be happy for this moment. This moment is your life.
  16. God sometimes takes us into troubled waters, not to drown us, but to cleanse us.
  17. For I am persuaded that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:38-39
  18. Think positive, be positive.
  19. And God will wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.
  20. Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind. ~ Dr. Seuss.
  21. Pray More, worry less.
  22. Nothing is going to startle us more when we pass through the veil to the other side than when we realize how well we know our Father in Heaven and how familiar his face is to us. ~ Ezra Taft Benson
  23. There are far, far better things ahead, than any we have left behind. ~ C.S. Lewis
  24. You were given this life because you are strong enough to live it.
  25. It is your reaction to adversity, not the adversity itself that determines how your life’s story will develop. ~ Dieter F. Uchtdorf
  26. Courage, dear heart. ~ C.S. Lewis
  27. The question is not how to survive, but how to thrive with passion, compassion, humor and style. ~ Maya Angelou
  28. Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better. ~ Maya Angelou
  29. All flesh is in my hands; be still and know that I am God.” D&C 101:16 30.
  30. We tend to forget that happiness doesn’t come as a result of getting something we don’t have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have. ~ Frederick Keonig
  31. When one door of happiness closes, another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us. ~ Helen Keller
  32. Happiness is a state of activity. ~ Aristotle
  33. It was only a sunny smile, and little it cost in the giving, but like morning light it scattered the night and made the day worth living. ~ F. Scott Fitzgerald
  34. Look to me in every thought. Doubt not. Fear not.” D&C 6:36 39.
  35. Happiness is the art of never holding in your mind the memory of any unpleasant thing that has passed.
  36. If you want happiness for an hour — take a nap. If you want happiness for a day — go fishing. If you want happiness for a year — inherit a fortune. If you want happiness for a lifetime — help someone else.
  37. It isn’t what you have, or who you are, or where you are, or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy. It is what you think about.
  38. for I Nephi will show unto you that the tender mercies of the Lord are over all those whom he hath chosen, because of their faith, to make them mighty even unto the power of deliverance.” 1 Nephi 1:20
  39. Being happy doesn’t mean everything is perfect. It means you’ve decided to look beyond the imperfections.”
  40. Happiness is letting go of what you think your life is supposed to look like and celebrating it for everything that it is. ~ Mandy Hale
  41. Comparison is the thief of joy.”
  42. Bloom where you are planted.”
  43. I am encircled about eternally in the arms of His love.” 1 Nephi 1:15
  44. But the Lord stood with me, and gave me strength.” 2 Timothy 4:17
  45. 5 Simple Rules to be HAPPY 1) Free your mind from hate 2) Free your mind from worry 3) Live simply 4) Give more 5) Expect less
  46. Happy are those who take life day by day, complain very little and are thankful for the little things in life.
  47. He hath made everything beautiful in his time.” Ecclesiastes 3:11
  48. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. ~ Psalm 22:6
  49. Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.” John 14:27
  50. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. ~ Philippians 4:13

Perfectly Imperfect

I love moments when I have opportunities to reinforce this with our daughters. Because the truth is the world will always tell us we are not good enough. It is our job to remind them of Psalm 139:14.

The person you give the beautiful painting to constantly points out its flaws. How does that make you feel?
We feel small.
We feel less than.
We feel weak.
We feel flawed.
We feel incapable.
We feel unworthy.
We feel angry.
We feel sad.
We feel defeated.
We feel imperfect.

There are 2 billion women with girls on this planet who have not heard of Jesus or do not know Him. Perhaps having the same feelings about the painting He has given to them too.

Perfectly imperfect is God's reality about you and me, my sweet girls. Imperfection is and always will be perfectly enough for His love.

We want to follow Jesus but doubt our ability to do it. Well of course given what we see above. But what if it is not about doubting our faith. What if it is that Jesus has faith in you?

Perfectly imperfect in Jesus's eyes.❤️

Loved By Grace,
Aimee

The Struggle Is Real

Something slightly profound hit me this week. No, I'm not talking about any divine prophesy such as the one the twelve year old asked me yesterday. Unfortunately I do not know when the end of the world will happen but I do not trust it will be on Saturday. Apparently, the middle school demographic in town has its sights on this weekend. To which I say no freaking way! I have a beach to go park myself on and never leave. Good luck with dooms day darlings.

Anyhoo, I draw my answer from devotion this week…only God knows this answer, we are not God and thank the Lord for that because I do not need to know everything! Hallelujah.

Back to my profound moment on this road of personal evolution. Seeing as though Saturday will probably come and go just fine.

Self clarity 101…I've spent a good part of my life accepting suffering solely from a powerless perspective. And for me, the experience and reaction to powerlessness was learned through abuse in childhood. When we are not in control and yet dependent on others who are not honoring our well being, we are powerless. Therefore suffering equals powerless and powerless is always negative.

When I say this I mean intensely UBER negative. Suffering naturally then, is to be avoided at all costs. Not just for ourselves but for everyone around us. Insert hashtag, #hyper-vigilant. Which I think is normal human reaction but even more so for those who have lived with abuse or neglect.

But in order for us to understand grace, we have to understand we are utterly dependent on God. That dependency however is a positive one.

And so, I've been tackling this issue of powerlessness at therapy. This week I used my boys as an example and the countless times I have looked at them and thought, I could not live through witnessing this kind of struggle in their life or those they grow up loving. As if somehow avoiding suffering for them wills myself to an amount normalcy in my own life.

Normalcy…what exactly is it? Another writing topic all together for some other day.

Avoiding suffering of any kind could be looked at very differently. Yes, most mothers would never wish suffering on their child. I would argue most mothers can cause themselves a great level of anxiety thinking about all the bad things that can happen around us. But that doesn't change the fact that suffering happens.

In many cases though, suffering brings us directly to God. Our struggle so often becomes a crossroad to the cross. A stronger faith and a closer relationship with Jesus. So even though we are powerless, we trust that Jesus isn't! Because, He is the best!

Suddenly that isn't so negative.

I don't think I would have truly understood this without struggle. I would never trade Jesus for anything. Would I be at this level of faith without it? Would I be a witness to Christ without burden? That is a much different way to think about a beautiful hot mess.

Therefore I need not avoid suffering, for myself or others. Perhaps even the absence of or minimal experiences of suffering serves as a liability to faith.

It's the way we learn that He is God and we are not. ❤️

Now if you'll excuse me, decompressing from the kindergarten cop title of the week. The ten year old talking to me about the fact that he has dark hair growing in places…was not quite what I had in the decompressing mind. Oh buddy, fifth grade means health class this year and talks about puberty. This is normal okay. But yes, you can talk to Mom about it any time but really? On the expressway in a traffic jam? Well, dark hair is growing on my big toe.

Lord help me! Thank goodness God is God and I am NOT!

Now one more time…if you'll excuse me, I will be on the big lake with a book. No household responsibility, no littles to keep alive and perhaps a few adult beverages. Invitation declined…said no Mom EVA!

And we all said, A to the MEN!

Slow down enough to see and hear God's voice. ❤️

Loved By Grace,
Aimee

Confessions of the Beer Cart

Yesterday might have been the craziest night working the concert circuit, otherwise called confessions of the beer cart. First starting with amped up security measures becoming more and more increasingly similar to air traffic control homeland security.

Apparently there were protesters outside and concerns of altercation sparked by the celebrity in town to take the stage. Sadly, this is a reality of the times. I did not see the protesters since staff security commences at the back of the arena. However we could sign a petition outside to legalize marijuana. Which in case you've never been smacked straight in the nostrils with a contact high in or around a stadium,
…signing or not signing is a futile point.

I'm not really sure where I land on the spectrum of this population demographic as it was quite varied. But I was less than impressed with Kid Rock. Perhaps I belonged outside with the protesters, I don't know, I guess we land somewhere in the middle at the medal detectors.

The patrons were mostly happy campers so this always makes for a fun night. I mean, who isn't happy with the beer server celebrating their 21st birthday with them upon verifying a birth year of 1976. That guy came back like ten times although he might not be feeling very well today. Lol.

The 1938 birth year was priceless because we have to card everyone. I must say I was thrilled to see such a young lad at a rap/country/rock concert. You go guy! I was fairly certain he came with his granddaughter who giggled when he finally got his beer…until she leaned in toward him in a much different way. Oops, guess it is NOT a granddaughter! Thank goodness I did not say your grandpa is so cute when she giggled. I'm telling you Loves, never judge a book by its cover. That might have been a mess but one for the book.

We are also therapists at the beer cart in case you did not know. In this particular instance to the tune of a $500 Ticketmaster bill for the floor area only to discover it paid for nose bleed seats. This poor woman was a mess, no shoes on her feet, she just wanted a beer to drown out her troubles. They are working on a refund, no worries friends. We have this under control but we had tears nevertheless and no shoes on the feet. What happened to your shoes?! She ditched them and she doesn't care. You poor thing, we need to have you do a keg stand instead of just one beer. Yep, that will take care of it. Boyfriend had no idea what a keg stand is so then we had an educational conversation about various keg activities. Okay, keg stand, I'm
just kidding. But then she left laughing with her beer so the therapy session was a success and she also might not be feeling very well today.

Now, I'm not endorsing or rebuking heavy drinking. That is between Jesus and the patrons. Our job at the beer cart is to love them either way.

Anyhoo, Kid Rock is very vocal about himself. The first thing he said was this:

You are all here to help fill up my big fat pockets.

Yes, I'm serious. This was his opening statement followed by a political speech ending in Kid Rock for President of the United States. Followed by other statements about the poor and other deadbeats our country supports.

I don't know, we all have different views on politics and that is our right. I get it, we are going to perceive truths based around our life experiences so we can give Kid Rock the benefit of the doubt. He has after all given much to his hometown of Detroit.

However, he lost me personally at filling up my big fat pockets. Which I really like his restaurant we dined at not too long ago but somehow I am no longer interested in that kind of fine dining. Jesus, I wanted to pour the beer over his head so I definitely need forgiveness over that thought. And while I'm at it, the profanity filled derogatory comments about women did not produce kind thoughts on my part either. Insert angry face…

Anything that creates a negative reaction in me I have to ask myself, would we hear Jesus say that? Big fat pockets NO from confessions of the beer cart.

But our patrons were happy and I'm certain warming up hearts is more important than pockets.

Loved By Grace,
Aimee

This Is Motherhood

Heaven help me, I'm officially a parent of a middle schooler. I've come to the conclusion that this stage of parenting is no less of a beautiful mess than any other clueless right of passages dubbed child raising reality. We just trade conquered messes for new messes.

Sure, my survival status over the next few years is questionable but for now I'm doing my best to act like I have it all together. See, that right there is no different than the preschool years. If you don't believe me, the door prize at our first MOPS is going to the mother who has dressed herself and gotten herself out the door. Yay Mom! You go girl. Now, who is the longest running non showered parent in the room? Congratulations, you win the prize!!!!! Yes, it is shining a light on the fact that we look like we have it all together with our non showered mess and all because this my friends, is what we call motherhood. Lol!

Anyhoo, messes are winners at MOPS! With love, your totally gets it, has it all together hospitality team.

Now, back to middle school because I'm a multi tasking kind of of girl which is just a fancy term for being the oldest kindergarten mother at the playground last night.

A little glimpse of our morning…It really could have been the scene in my bathroom.

I'm quite certain this is how the child sees me in this thing called adolescent motherhood. How quickly we forget laughing about those middle school photos of ancient times ago the other week. I believe the words were…why didn't anyone tell you how ridiculous you looked Mom?!!! Grandma seriously let you out the door like that? Yep, she sure did. Now, wouldn't you rather I look like this than you? That's what I thought so you need a shower.

That's it, I'm starting a new support group called the puberty fairies. We can use the same theme as MOPS and call it MOPFS. I have all the hospitality stuff covered except we just exchange dirty diaper for do it my way debate duty. You know, repeat, discuss and question five million times until we big fairies lose our sh*% kind of blowout.

Not to worry. I have lots of glitter & sparkles for quiet time and there is wine. With love, your totally gets it, has it all together MOPFS hospitality team.

Middle schoolers…be happy you have these puberty fairies at your service. We just might know what we are talking about, on occasion. Maybe even save you from a few of those embarrassing not so Kodak picture moments.

MOPFS friends…We know how to handle diaper blowout people! Which means we can handle any mess.

All joking aside, middle schooler was happy to have me by her side today. For a few a minutes anyway after we got through hygiene debate.

With that, here are things us puberty fairies want our middle schooler to know:

  • It's okay to be a kid sometimes and there is plenty time ahead of you to be an adult. Adulting is hard and not always fun. So be a kid, for as long as you can!
  • You will never admit it but you still like parents helping you with life. Go ahead and complain. You are safe so I rest my case.
  • You will win some battles but not everything you think you should be able to do will fly with this fairy. Be mad about it, I can take it.
  • So…no, you are not old enough to make all of your own decisions unless you are ready to support yourself. Here is the dance bill, lol. Okay, we'll be friends when we've survived this mess. 🙂
  • I will talk your ear off on the off chance I am not trying to embarrass you with my singing.
  • By the way, embarrassed by your parents prepares you to learn not to care what other people think.
  • You still like to cuddle and this is normal. Sometimes I need a hug from my Mom too and I'm ancient in middle schooler standards.
  • Nobody your age knows who or what they are in middle school. This my dear, is one giant mess.
  • Not everything feels so great when we are trying to figure ourselves out. This is normal and will prepare you well for adult life.
  • Not everyone is nice and middle school people can feel downright mean. The good news is that most of us grow out of it. Stay close to those peeps.
  • I promise whatever label you get or feel from middle school will have no bearing on what you do with your life or who you decide to become. Unless you let it. So don't!
  • See above…who cares what other people think. I know this is a hard one but it will serve you well.

Lastly, the Bible has some great stories of God using people just like you for amazing things! They are just like you. So, when this puberty fairy doesn't always understand you at every moment…know this, we will both live. Puberty fairies try not to fail but sometimes we will suck. Okay, we didn't always get to that dirty diaper right away either but we lived through that mess and we'll live through this too.

Dear middle schooler, when you don't feel understood by anyone or even understand yourself, know this. Jesus always does! So there is no way to mess up too badly.

Although try not to okay? Puberty fairies already have enough grey hair!

Loved By Grace,

Aimee

Keep Off The Stairs

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Exhibit 1

Keep calm and climb up the stairs because we do so well conforming to rules. Without a doubt, life motto right here. I would like to think something I’ve improved on as a thirty something…okay forty something…but…not so much peeps. Big sister is forty today though…okay fifty today so HA! Nothing has changed, I will not keep off the stairs and I’m super happy with that!

The children who inhabit my home had a good laugh this week because I pulled out pictures of my childhood to show them this defiant Mother in action. Which gave me a good reminder along with a few other embarrassing pieces of evidence…I do not follow suit of pretty much anything. Nope, give me regulations about life and I will defy that logic, EVERY single time.

The stroll down memory lane started because my son wanted to see proof of sports in action which nobody happens to believe. So my dear boy, here it is in all its glory…

IMG_3278.JPG
Exhibit 2
  • Take Away #1 – My son is like Mom!
  • Take Away #2 – Certain parents made my name a BILLBOARD on everything!
  • Take Away #3 – This mother gave this child the WORST hair cut known to man which I can say because it’s my Mom.
  • Take Away #4 – We laugh hard in this family so I’m happy to entertain with hot mess hair cut, this Cubby rocks.

By the time Cubby above got to high school, the princess was in full effect, in all her perfectly packaged glory. The kids reaction…whoa Mom, you do know what you are talking about with all that believe in yourself talk. What on earth is that in your hair though it is hilarious. The style people! I’m sure we’ll see it come back in to circulation next year and I will get EPIC  pictures. Oh yes I will, HA! Pay backs are you know what…lol.

IMG_3280
Exhibit 3

Any guesses what those softball coaches and players thought of hair scrunchy girl? You got it! No way this girl will ever make the team, she probably can’t even throw a ball. Seriously? Go back to beauty school where you belong. And this is what you say to it children…You must underestimate what you see because Cubby is here to stay.

The rest my Loves, is history.

The point is this…Cubby can get lost easily listening to noise. Flock off noise, Cubby need not listen.

Go be what Jesus knows you can be!

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Fast forward to this allstar champ and cubby. We don’t keep off the stairs, we climb them!

I love our adventures with Jesus. Until next year buddy! ❤️

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Loved By Grace,

Aimee

 

 

Life With A Ten Year Old Man

A madhouse run by a tiny arm you’ve created yourself…hashtag #MOTHERHOOD

Ladies, Momma’s, may the force be with us all. Lol!

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