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Oh my, I’m so thankful for these babies today.  The resource room at school all have their own unique stories and while not cognitive impairment, individual challenges that make school challenging nonetheless.  This video only includes a few of their voices and probably not ideal to share but I’m sharing it because it is a huge blessing.  He says brain is messed up…I disagree.

My buddy J arrives in the morning, gets off the bus and literally runs full force into my arms as he sees me waiting for him.  Oh my goodness, this child is just amazing.  We stop by the office to take his meds and then go down to get breakfast.  It is not easy getting this child to eat something, too many things to hold his attention.  But he needs to eat and I actually got him to take a few bites this morning so it’s a win.  We walk down to his locker to put his things away and he greets his classmate, as he does to everyone who comes in to contact with him in the hallways.  Not shy this one.  His friend shows him the book he just got from the Easter bunny and J says, “I’m sorry to tell you this D but that came from your Mom.”  Oh J, we need to have a chat about mindfulness buddy and you are in second grade, you don’t believe in the Easter bunny?  Nope, sure doesn’t.  Okay well some of your friends do so we need to try to be mindful about what we say so they can still have fun with it okay?  Understand?  Yes, good

You see peeps, my buddy J doesn’t feel like his brain works correctly.  Listen to his words. So this is my promise to J today…when he says something that doesn’t make sense; when he says something he shouldn’t necessarily say out loud; when he says something he needs to say but might hurt others feelings; when he says something he doesn’t mean and definitely when he keeps saying he means it but doesn’t…I will pause.  Even if it hurts me I will pause.  After the pause, I will remind myself that my mind thinks differently at times from him and that I need to stay with him on this matter because when we are in the zone it is a beautiful thing.  The minute I step outside the zone with him it becomes a beautiful hot mess.  Most of us are programmed according to what the cookie cutter machine that is what we call culture has taught us.  School is a breeding ground for this A grade report card.  But I want to strive for E and J needs us to strive for E.  Here is the deal…unfortunately for amazing peeps like my buddy J this is for them who get caught trying to speak a natural language in this machine that doesn’t want to hear or can’t hear for whatever reason.  This kid, this amazing J of mine is teaching me how to hear differently.

When I pause, I’m going to try a new method which is to rework what my mind is saying it hears and try my damnedest to speak his language.  I might even need to say to myself, oh gee Aimee you hear this so get out a freaking piece of paper and write the exact opposite.  Jesus kind of love right there and I want to be better.  Shit, I’m human so that sucks because I fail at this daily but J needs it peeps.  This kind of thing takes takes iron clad strength Loves, strength all of his teachers fail him on at times.  But he is growing this iron clad strength in me every time I get to spend time with him and he is just an incredible kid.  And so…iron clad strength in the zone is the place to find just like Jesus is growing it in me too.

He wouldn’t read with me this morning, said he was too stressed about his friend.  Oh, what happened? I’m told his friend hurt him yesterday and J told him he doesn’t want to see him ever again.  Not sure if this was an accident or intentional and I didn’t ask but nevertheless he hurt J, scratched him to be exact.  Well J, do you really mean this?  Yes, I mean it.  Are you sure?  Yes, yes, yes. Oh, okay but we can talk about it if you need.  Then J tells me they got in a fight last year but he comes over to play all the time.  Oh, I think I get it J…your friend hurt you but you don’t mean that you don’t want to see him anymore right? Because you just said you fight with each other and you get hurt but that he still comes over to play.  Yes, I just want him to be nice so I can see him.  Oh, okay got it. Perhaps J just needs him to pause, to hear correctly…

Can we read together now J?  Good, YAY!

Dear J, you kicked the shit out of that math page when we finally got in the zone as I knew you would my friend.  Bribery works, now you get to look at my phone which you turned on some feature I didn’t know existed!  Buddy you have a bright future ahead of you and don’t ever stop believing it!  Oh my goodness, I adore this kid.

Then there is C with an entirely different story.  I don’t think I’ve written about C but he is just the sweetest fourth grader EVA.  I can’t believe how far he has come since September when I first met him.  He would not even look at me that day, full of rage. The moment we had back then and a story I will never forget for the rest of my life.  To be continued…

Loved By Grace,

Aimee

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